Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Thank God that this is a short week, I am really enjoying being back at work, but we are all sick, and I am really stressed over the daycare situation. Arianna cried all day yesterday, and we kept her out sick today, but I am just terrified that she is not going to settle. I really hope that going to work was not a mistake and that I can make everything work.
I miss being home, and I really miss having friends that I can call and go out for a chat or have tea with. I need to find balance and happiness.
I am really hoping to get a good sleep tonight, I need it!
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
So it's been a few days since I've posted anything but it's been busy around here lately! I got my old job back, and I started today. I am really happy to be working again, and although I really missed Arianna today, I think this will be excellent for both of us.
Now is the time when my planning and determination to lose weight will really be challenged though, because I will have to plan my lunches and suppers and find the time and energy to fit in workouts. It will be good though and I am happy that I am signed up for bootycamp and the learn to run clinic because now I am more motivated to exercise on these days.
I will post my meals and planning when I have a chance to sit and figure everything out, just to keep me accountable.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Even though at times my legs were shaking and my lungs felt like exploding, I kept going and I gave it my all. I am hoping to get as much as I can out of this, and hopefully I will be able to sign up again either in the summer or fall, depending on Joey's schedule.
I am loving bootycamp and the feeling I am getting from pushing my self and not giving up!!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
I was pretty intimidated and nervous when I first got there and everyone was thin and seemed like they were in good shape, I was also the only one there who wasn't with someone that they knew already, but once the class started It didn't matter what else was going on, I focused on the exercises and working as hard as I could.
Some things were harder than others, like burpees, and some things I will definitely have to build up my endurance for, like jogging, bit all in all I really enjoyed my first experience.
As the evening went on I soon discovered that most of the other ladies were in the same boat as me, not knowing what to expect, and knowing that they would definitely be feeling the soreness the next day :P as of right now I love bootycamp and I am so glad that I got picked to experience this 4 week camp.
Now I just need to find the motivation to eat clean so that I can get fit, and healthy and work towards my goal of one day helping others with their weight loss and fitness needs.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
I don't know who I am, or where I belong. I just wish I could be happy and live instead of thinking about everything that I am not, and all of the things that I have done wrong.
I was so happy once......
Monday, May 3, 2010
My eats were ok until this evening, I had some fruit which was good, but then I had some veggie chip things that Joey got at Costco, and they had to be fried. They tasted so good, but I could see and feel the grease...oh well it truly could have been much worse considering the fact that I found out a very close family member has skin cancer, and quite possibly serious Melanoma. I am in the dark as to most of the details, but right now I am feeling sad and stressed and scared about the outcome.
I will be going to bed tonight praying for health and good news.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
The evening was spent looking at child care places in case tomorrow's interview goes well, hopefully it does because I'm starting to run out of options.
If I do start work again, I'm hoping to find my food motivation again because I will have to plan my lunches, snacks etc ahead of time, but I'll also have to work hard to stay organized and on top of things regarding exercise and suppers. It's all too easy to just grab something after work rather than cooking, but now I have to think about Arianna's diet as well, so that's something.
I am starting bootycamp on thursday, and I am so nervous/excited!! I think I'll try something new every month or so to keep things fresh. so far I have
June/July- Learn to run
I feel crazy for signing up for these things at my size, but I obviously need the push that group fitness will give me.
So now I'm getting ready to head to bed and prepare for my interview.....everything is crossed that I get MY job back!
Thursday, April 29, 2010
I also did day 1 and 2 of the Jillian Michaels ifit workouts for the treadmill this week. I find them quite challenging at some parts, and I am a sweaty mess after just 20 minutes.
Next week will be kind of exciting/stressful for me because I have a job interview for my old job, Joey goes back to work and I start bootycamp. On top of that, depending on how the interview goes, I may be looking for full time childcare. It will be interesting to see how I handle the stress.
I am hoping to start blogging more regularly and to just become more organized in general.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Thursday, April 15, 2010
I'm not going all or nothing with the clean eating and I'm going to learn to cut myself some slack.
Tomorrow I plan on having a healthy breakfast, and then I'm heading to a job interview (eek!!)
lunch will be leftover tuna casserole and salad, and supper is Joey's choice as a welcome home thing, so we are going for Chinese.....not the best choice, but after tomorrow things should settle down a bit.
my exercise plan for the rest of April is Walking with the baby in the stroller, doing Ifit on the treadmill and biggest loser Yoga.
In May I am signed up for the Booty Camp Fitness session, and although it will be killer, I can't wait. I also have a coupon from Brita for a free running room clinic, so I'm going to see if I can sign up for the June learn to run session.
I realize that Joey gets motivated once I get things started and so that means I must get the ball rolling ASAP for both of us!
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
you can check out his blog and the contest here http://www.yourinnerskinny.ca/2010/04/07/6-month-anniversary-and-giveaway
Sunday, April 11, 2010
- I was in Cape Breton for 3 weeks, and Arianna was super sick, and whiny so the exercise and eating wasn't the best. I am up 3-4 lbs which sucks but I'll deal with it.
- Joey is home now, and it seems like I've gone into vacation mode. I am not eating well, I can't remember the last time I've exercised and I have no desire or drive to do anything. Joey and I are notorious for being able to sabotage ourselves really well, but I'm working hard to change things for all of us.
The big thing is I have set a huge goal for myself. I have decided that since this is my last year in my 20's that I am giong to make it my healthiest and fittest year ever. I am hoping to lose 100 lbs by April 2, 2011. I hope I can do this. I usually don't like to set specific goals like this but as long as I give it everything I've got, I won't be disappointed with the results.
So here I am, back to basics. Clean eating, exercise including Cardio and strength, and planning and tracking everything. I have to succeed this time.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
The baby has been sick for a while, add in a 39.9 celsius temperature, a trip to ER and night time waking issues and that could explain some of the stress eating. Also I am not home so I don't have access to my workout stuff and the food choices here are not ideal, but these are just excuses. I've been doing this long enough to know that the situation can't always be perfect, and I have to make the best of what I have available. I just wish I had someone to kick me in the butt and help me get my motivation back.
Since I don't have that I'll just keep swimming against the current until I make it. I can and will do this.
I will not be a fat mom, that is a promise.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Friday, March 5, 2010
I got the spot that I wanted in the daycare, and Arianna really liked it, but I wasn't even considered for the job :( so bye bye daycare.
The week started out with major anxiety waiting for word on the job, and ended with major disappointment about not even being considered for a job that I enjoyed and did really well.
Due to the stress and wacky eating/ hormone shifts etc I am up 1.2 lbs. I am totally ok with that, I am back on track and ran today. Onward and upward.
Hopefully now I'll be able to sleep and get things done, instead of stressing and worrying. I have a to do list the size of my arm and I gotta get working on it!!
night night :)
Sunday, February 28, 2010
I was so anxious on Friday that I thought I would pass out, so I took to the treadmill and ran off some energy. Yesterday was a really snacky day and I just couldn't get full, but I tracked everything and didn't do too badly. I did my exercise in the evening since I needed a nap in the afternoon and that combination meant that I did not get to sleep until 1am *gag*
Today was exercise rest day so I had another nap, hopefully it doesn't mess my sleep up tonight. I know that my mind will be racing anyway until I hear about the job situation, but hopefully I'll get some sleep.
Tomorrow's plan is to run 2 minutes and walk 1, we'll see how it goes.
I'm also going to eat cleaner this week because I have 12lbs to go until I reach my first mini goal of 299 lbs. It's been years since I've seen that number.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
It couldn't be better hours (finished by 3:45 Pm) monday to friday, I know all of the clients, and I enjoyed the work. I feel sad about the possibility of not being a stay at home mom, and I'll miss Arianna like crazy, but in order to provide extras and have some security, I need to work.
I've been in contact with a daycare and I have my fingers crossed that when they call back on Friday I'll have a daycare spot. I just feel like this is meant to be, and I am praying that everything lines up and comes through.
I did my run today, and it felt good, I'm still doing 90 seconds running and 1 min walking but it's getting better. my eating is going well, not fully clean but I'm sticking to my points and measuring things again.
I am so excited that in 6 weeks Joey will be back, it's been a long 4 months!!
I'm off to bed, it's been a hectic day!
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Arianna is still pretty sick so we're taking it easy today. We're not going to make it to the Deployment briefing, but we'll go down and do our video call later. Our time is 6:10 pm so I hope she's not too cranky then.
If she's not better tomorrow, it looks like another trip to the doctor.
Today is my off day for exercise so nothing to report there.
I applied for a couple of jobs lately, so fingers crossed that something comes through!
Saturday, February 20, 2010
- Arianna is still sick :(
- Tomorrow we have a 5 minute video call with Joey!!
- I RAN TODAY!!! (finally after putting it off for days) it felt great too!!
- I started working on the basement again, and it looks bad now, but once I clean out all of the junk it will be great!
That is all for me todayNighty night peeps!!
Friday, February 19, 2010
I was exhausted today and felt like I was in a fog all day and it was really bothering me, but I think it may be mood related. I have lost my momentum since I was sick, but tonight I am making a plan for the week and looking forward.
Arianna has a tonsil infection, so we aren't able to be around any kiddies for a few days, but she should be ok by sunday when we have our monthly deployment briefing, and 5 minute video call with Hubby!! Yay!
Hubby may be coming home a month early, so that means in 6.5 weeks he could be here! I am keeping my fingers crossed because I miss him so much.
Fantastic news too, I won a 4 week session at Booty Camp Fitness!!http://www.bootycampfitness.com/ I am so excited because I've been seeing reviews in the blog world and it looks like an awesome workout!! I am trying to get the details straightened out for when etc, as it will have to be when Joey is home! A huge thanks ti Skinny Me for offering the contest!! http://weightwatcher76.blogspot.com/
I finally got to try my new IFIT videos for the treadmill too. I have level 1, 2 and 3 of Jillian Michael's lose weight series. The thing that I love about these cards is that they change the intensity and incline for you.
The workout started out a little slow, but soon I was sweating and climbing hills, with a max incline of 7% it was a great workout and Jillian gave random tricks and encouragement throughout the 20 minute workout. It was only day 1 but I enjoyed it so far. Level 1 is designed to be done 3x per week for 6 weeks, so we'll see how it goes.
I'm going to give running another try tomorrow, but I'm not going to stress over it (yeah right....lol)
Anyway, I blabbed on enough for tonight, Happy Friday!
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
- No run today, I had to shovel snow for 80 minutes instead. We had a few feet in the Driveway
- I'm going slightly shack wacky
- I tracked all of my foods today
- I am starting to freak out about money/job issues but I am not stress eating!
- I really miss my husband and I am feeling a little exhausted and overwhelmed.
- Another day is over and tomorrow is a blank canvas.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
I took A for a walk today, I figured we could both use the fresh air after the weekend of sickness. I am hoping all that has passed, even though my stomach feels a little icky from time to time.
Tomorrow is a run day, I'm hoping I didn't set myself back too far by not running since Friday but I'll see what happens.
I am stressing a little over the fact that I will probably have to get a job when Joey comes home. I was really hoping to be successful at Pampered Chef. I just wish I could figure something out.
Anyway, I'm off to bed and hopefully I'm not as restless as I was last night.
Monday, February 15, 2010
So I was still feeling crappy all day yesterday, and most of today, but I actually have an appetite right now, so that's a good sign. I am hoping to get in some form of exercise tomorrow, although I'm not sure yet if it will be a run. It depends on the energy situation.
I really need to really get serious about tracking and weighing/measuring my food again. I have been coasting for a little while, and I am not seeing the results that I want to see. I am also planning to write out some goals and things that I wish to accomplish in the near future both in weight loss and life in general.
I am kicking and screaming my way back to the surface so stay tuned for my transformation :)
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Tomorrow is another planned run day, but I'll have to see how I feel. If it's anything like right now, I will collapse on the treadmill.
Joey called today, it was so nice to hear his voice, but I hate letting him go. I miss him so much today. We're supposed to go to a deployment activity tomorrow, but I'm thinking that I won't be feeling up to it.
I guess I'm just a little bummed that I am working hard at being healthy, but I end up getting every bug going.
oh well, hopefully better days ahead!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Tomorrow is a scheduled run day, and I think I am getting a cold, but I am still going to try my best to run. If it is too much I will walk, but at least I'll try.
The eats went well today, I had a kids pot luck at playgroup, but I didn't eat anything because tomorrow is weigh in. I skipped lunch in favor of a nap when Arianna went down because I had a massive headache, and I didn't drink enough water today, but tomorrow is a new day.
I am working on getting organized with meal planning and clean eating, but that is a work in progress.
I think it is time to chill on the couch with some water and a big juicy orange for vitamin C. Blah I hope I am not getting sick!!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Sunday, February 7, 2010
I thought about going for a walk but it's still freezing out and I'm just too cold lately to venture out. Tomorrow I have to run anyway so a rest day is good.
Tomorrow is the last day of run 1min walk 1 min, and I figure in order to run 1:30 I will have to lower the speed, but I am willing to do what ever it takes to keep running. I am toying with the idea of registering for the bluenose 5k run but I'm terrified at the thought and afraid that I will fail.
I am working on it and it would be something great that I can do for me!
well, I guess that's it. 12 weeks until Joey comes home!!
Monday, February 1, 2010
Today was a good day. We went to a play group, so I got lots of exercise chasing Arianna around, and then we relaxed this afternoon. After Arianna went to bed I had planned on doing a treadmill workout, and I almost had myself talked out of it all day, but I went down and did it anyway. I just have to keep reminding myself that I want to look as good as I possibly can when joey comes home in just over 3 months.
I did 5 mins warm up
10 run 1 min/walk 1 min intervals
for a total of 30 mins and it felt great (read I thought I was going to die at times :P)
Anyway, I guess people were right when they encouraged me to get out and see people. It is good for both of us to have the interaction and variety that it provides. I think I am finally crawling out of my rut, which will help my mood and my weight loss.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
I did ok on the eating front this weekend even though I was stressed and unhappy for most of the time. I feel bad sometimes that Arianna is stuck with me, but I'm doing the best that I can right now.
I got a bit of a meal plan jotted down for the week, and hopefully next week I will introduce some new recipes so that I'm not getting bored.
Tomorrow is a scheduled run day, so hopefully I will find the motivation to do that. I am doing a 5 min warm up and running 1 minute walking 1 minute, and then cool down. Last week I did 6 run/walk intervals, and this week I am hoping to increase to either 10 intervals or 1 min 30 seconds running. I'm not sure yet.
I'm thinking of heading to a play group tomorrow just to get out. I think I just need to be around people to feel human again, but for some reason I just feel like avoiding people even more. I need to stop that. There are a few people that want me to call, so I am putting it out there that I am going to start calling people and going out to preserve my sanity.
sorry for the downer post, tomorrow will be a better day.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Today is officially half way until DH comes home! Some days I wonder if I can make it, but I know it's just a little over 3 months.
Eating has been going good, and I am exercising as much as possible. today's exercise was all about shoveling. We got some snow overnight, so I bundled up A and we went out to start the driveway. I got about half done and then it was time to go in and get warmed up. I finished the other half after A went to bed, and of course the plow had dumped more heavy snow in the bottom of the driveway so my arms may be a little sore tomorrow.
I am scheduled to run tomorrow, as I am taking another shot at learning to run. I am working on running every second day but it has to be at nap or bed time so sometimes motivation is sorely lacking.
I am having a hard time getting organized enough to make up weekly meal plans, but I know that once I do that it will be great for my weight loss and my wallet.
I am thinking about a "no spend" challenge for February. I was reading about it on a yummy mummy blog. I will still spend money on fresh foods and milk etc. but I will not spend any extras. I seem to be coping with stress and boredom by spending, and we really don't have the money or the space for any more stuff!
Well, it's friday at 8:50 pm and I am seriously considering going to bed. I am cold, tired and lonely. I find the weekends the worst!